Sometimes, it seems to take a slap in the face to wake back up to the world after something like the struggles of care-taking and constantly pushing your needs to the back burner. Where is the happiness and joy I once felt with horses? Everything is a chore. I just want to get it all done and go home.
Case in point lastnight, the Universe decided to smile on me for a moment.
The Cheerful Horse... when set right with his comfort by a cold shower, a high powered fan, a special clip of his Cushings fur for ventilation and a good showering of new flyspray... may intend to show case his thankfulness with random displays of joy during exercise.
I swear I wish I had pictures of this.
Lastnight we set out for some controlled free lunging in a paddock next to the barn. The area is nice - 2 large shade trees, soft grass, etc. The object was to stretch his legs and get circulation going because we'd had 2 days of intense heat (95*) and riding/working specific muscle groups, which I'm sure left him sore. D hadn't even gotten once around before he took off at a peppy trot and ended up on the other end of the paddock, head and tail in-air. He shot me a look as he passed... something like Haha! Didn't see that coming, did you?
Crazy horse. He exploded several times into nice canters (complete with head shaking and grunting), and several more times into spontaneous trots. Eventually we noticed a family of deer had wondered over into a neighbouring paddock and were watching us, aghast. D found this amusing and actually trotted closer to get a look at them, and possibly show off. I guess he wasn't so sore after all...
The reason this is so amazing to me is probably two-fold.
One - yes, he is 26 and his 'good days' are fewer now due to the complications with Cushings, hoof issues occasionally, joint issues, heat intolerance, etc. For a former founder, with a variety of issues, while he does well - he's not got the same level of energy he did as a young horse.
Two - the troubles we've kept having have continued to jade me and I often find myself thinking we won't get any better than what I see everyday: the mundane parts of life where we trudge through chores and exercise, call it a day to sleep to start over the next...
Seeing him, of his own volition out and about - sporting and showing off, whether for me or the deer, was a shock. And one I needed.
The Cheerful Horse, that's what I'm doing all this for.
Showing posts with label recovery. Show all posts
Showing posts with label recovery. Show all posts
Sunday, August 2, 2015
Wednesday, January 1, 2014
2013 ~ Reviewed
Well then... who'd have ever thought we'd have come as far as we have in a single year?
Who'd have ever thought I'd get to take a starlight ride on Christmas Eve with Diego this year? Galloping recklessly through a field to burn off excess energy... freezing our noses off simultaneously!
Who'd have thought I'd be able to point him at a fence (a small one of course) and have him leap it like a champ, with plenty of room to spare?
Who'd have thought I'd be able to go more than a week without hoof issues and a lethargic horse?
Amazing, really.
The beginning of the year really started out horribly. On New Years day I was at the barn in the pouring rain calming an upset horse who kept running through the fence, while my boyfriend helped fix said fence. :/ Not great memories.
March and April brought some struggles with weight and metabolic management - usually involving hay and hay tests. We battled hoof inflammation and pain, along with plenty of rain rot (despite a great diet) and the effects of warming temps. And clippers that refused to work...
May and June really settled down and for the first time in a long time I had real hope. We were riding again!
July was the turning point when I started to see my old horse come back. He was FIT and FIESTY! And I was horribly UNfit and desperately needed to workout!
August got bumpy right before vacation. I delayed too long in raising his medication for PPID and the hormonal seasonal rise started to undo our hard work: he got ulcers and his muscle began wasting again. September I played 'clean up crew' for that little mess.
October and November came out well, despite a 2 week hiccup due to a laminitis bout. We worked our collective rear off! I saw little muscular improvement in comparison with my expectations, but I kept at it despite.
December wrapped everything up so nicely. Despite record cold temps, D stayed stable health-wise and we kept working. Muscle FINALLY has started filling in his topline and rump. I was told that random visitors to the barn who are often looking for a horse to buy, stopped at his stall asking about him. Even the DQ wife of our vet took an interest...
I'm shocked and thrilled at what we've been able to accomplish, but I'm also chafing under the burden of new responsibilities. Riding again means fitness goals, and fitness goals means finding time and space to ride when I'd really rather do something else - rain - shine - wind - sleet - even sick.
It also means Diego tends to resent me more, there are many days he doesn't want to work anymore than I do. This is something I really wish I could fix.. I can't say I blame him. This is the one disconnect between horses and humans that I really hate: the ability to look forward into the future: to plan and to guesstimate. I know what will happen if he loses the condition we've worked so hard to build - he doesn't. I know he will be more stiff and his arthritis will get worse if we don't move enough - he doesn't. If he had his way he'd prefer his face stuck in a high-sugar roundbale of hay 24/7 in a small crew of mixed-sex horses that he could boss around any way that he saw fit. Hmmm... yeah. Not gonna happen hun, sorry.
Still though - I wish I could find a nicer kinder way to bring him around on those days when we have to work.
I've been thinking about moving forward this next year - what do I ultimately want for us both? I can come up with a lot of things *I* want, but I really need to sit down and think about some goals for bettering Diego - not just for me, but for himself, to make him happier.
One idea I've been punting around in my head for the last week is his insecurity and herd-bound issues. It occurs to me that this has been a problem for a long time, and a very serious one. Now I will continue to do what I can to be a trustworthy partner, in hopes that he might relax into my guardianship (we really should have eachother's backs when we're out alone so much), but I'd like to find some way to build his own confidence so that he's able to trust himself a little more too. In short: I think his world has grown too small. Experience, although sometimes stressful is the only way to really test yourself in the 'alone' department. I'd really like to concentrate on enlarging his world this next year... this means getting out and seeing the world: going places, doing things together.
Some ideas:
Who'd have ever thought I'd get to take a starlight ride on Christmas Eve with Diego this year? Galloping recklessly through a field to burn off excess energy... freezing our noses off simultaneously!
Who'd have thought I'd be able to point him at a fence (a small one of course) and have him leap it like a champ, with plenty of room to spare?
Who'd have thought I'd be able to go more than a week without hoof issues and a lethargic horse?
Amazing, really.
The beginning of the year really started out horribly. On New Years day I was at the barn in the pouring rain calming an upset horse who kept running through the fence, while my boyfriend helped fix said fence. :/ Not great memories.
February brought a new barn, new acquaintances and all-around new experiences. I hate moving, I hate leaving people I know for situations and people I don't know. I hate starting over. The good news was that Diego made friends quickly and 'settled down" into a happy horse, promptly surpassing my expectations.
May and June really settled down and for the first time in a long time I had real hope. We were riding again!
August got bumpy right before vacation. I delayed too long in raising his medication for PPID and the hormonal seasonal rise started to undo our hard work: he got ulcers and his muscle began wasting again. September I played 'clean up crew' for that little mess.
October and November came out well, despite a 2 week hiccup due to a laminitis bout. We worked our collective rear off! I saw little muscular improvement in comparison with my expectations, but I kept at it despite.
Yay! Christmas horsie! (or Krampus, your choice ;p )
I can't even begin to say how relieved I am to see him happy and healthy again. It really is incredible... Here's to hoping 2014 is just as good for us!
Happy New Year, All
I'm shocked and thrilled at what we've been able to accomplish, but I'm also chafing under the burden of new responsibilities. Riding again means fitness goals, and fitness goals means finding time and space to ride when I'd really rather do something else - rain - shine - wind - sleet - even sick.
It also means Diego tends to resent me more, there are many days he doesn't want to work anymore than I do. This is something I really wish I could fix.. I can't say I blame him. This is the one disconnect between horses and humans that I really hate: the ability to look forward into the future: to plan and to guesstimate. I know what will happen if he loses the condition we've worked so hard to build - he doesn't. I know he will be more stiff and his arthritis will get worse if we don't move enough - he doesn't. If he had his way he'd prefer his face stuck in a high-sugar roundbale of hay 24/7 in a small crew of mixed-sex horses that he could boss around any way that he saw fit. Hmmm... yeah. Not gonna happen hun, sorry.
Still though - I wish I could find a nicer kinder way to bring him around on those days when we have to work.
I've been thinking about moving forward this next year - what do I ultimately want for us both? I can come up with a lot of things *I* want, but I really need to sit down and think about some goals for bettering Diego - not just for me, but for himself, to make him happier.
One idea I've been punting around in my head for the last week is his insecurity and herd-bound issues. It occurs to me that this has been a problem for a long time, and a very serious one. Now I will continue to do what I can to be a trustworthy partner, in hopes that he might relax into my guardianship (we really should have eachother's backs when we're out alone so much), but I'd like to find some way to build his own confidence so that he's able to trust himself a little more too. In short: I think his world has grown too small. Experience, although sometimes stressful is the only way to really test yourself in the 'alone' department. I'd really like to concentrate on enlarging his world this next year... this means getting out and seeing the world: going places, doing things together.
Some ideas:
- Visit horsey-friends places!
So far this has been difficult because it relies on other people's time and resources too (I have no trailer), but I'll keep trying. A short day visit I think would help him greatly. - Trails! Trails! Trails!
A definite goal. We need to test our meddle out on the open trails to better assess fitness and emotional stability (Does he have any? Can he handle being left behind without throwing me? etc.). From there we'll know what we have to work on. - Social gatherings
Whether it be a small schooling show, a big group trail ride or even signing up for a hunter pace (something remotely long-ish as prep for LD rides). Anything to expose him to the good 'ol hustle and bustle of other horses and humans again.
Saturday, April 20, 2013
Dusk and the Setting Sun
I slapped on the boots, the bareback pad and clipped my reins to his flat-banded nylon halter. At first he looked at me suspiciously and made a move to walk away (then quickly got distracted by a bucket of food placed dumbly in the middle of the barn aisle.) but once we stepped outside he was clearly on his toes. By the time we got to the pasture I could feel he was pretty wired throughout his entire body. He stood still for me to mount (barely, tensely) from the trailer wheel-well (great place to mount - will have to remember that) and enthusiastically took off at a FAST walk.
We made a loop around the edge of the pasture and back, a total of about 15 minutes, start to end. His back has such poor muscling that I just can't bring myself to stress his spine with my weight too much right now. I was surprised however in the ease at which he carried me for the most part.. then again I am trying my best nowdays to be a model of near perfect balance for him. This includes the ever careful alignment of my spine in proper orientation with his and keeping our center of gravities 'together' - one very good example is riding downhill: I do a mini 2-point seat. I tried this experiment several years back when I was still exploring riding before he got sick, turns out once I moved my center of gravity forwards, but in a balanced way D responded by moving down hills more freely and happily. Traditional riding logic would think that strange, but it kind of makes sense considering through out all my jump and huntseat training how I was taught to be balanced and light in all situations, even downhill. It was dressage training later that ruined part of my seat, ironically.
ANYWAYS! (tangents, tangents)
Back to the ride. D was feeling quite full of himself an opinionated - there was much head shaking, some impressive 90-degree turns (O.O did I mention I was bareback?), and on the way back to the gate a jig or two. Actually on the way back I afforded myself a treat, and when I see him today we will see if it was too much... but... I kept just enough contact to keep his head up, while letting him prance his way into a bouncy, collected trot. Normally I would strongly encourage him to walk again, fearing my merciless bouncing on his poor spine and his delicate hooves - but this time I said 'forget it. I'm just gonna sit here and stay balanced and hope he doesn't decide to buck me off in the end." (as he was still 100% wired). What came out of it was one of those events that really stick with you - those moments where you're in perfect harmony with your horse and both of you are enjoying whatever gait you're going along at, in relative easy and happiness. His head was up, neck tall fully extended, his poll flexed only slightly and although I bounced alittle, his back felt like a springy suspension bridge. If I tried I could almost imagine that I felt his front hooves hitting the ground independently - correctly. For those few strides he felt balanced, excited, powerful and truly perfect to ride.
Had dusk not been creeping in over the fields I think I would have wanted another round of the pasture, but as it was the cold air and impending darkness (along with wayyy too many strange horses trying to sniff his butt) was making D alittle jumpy/insecure. I am still trying to ride the fine line between our workouts and keeping him from feeling forced, alone and scared. It will come with time, but part of that comes from me respecting his feelings on any given issue. I was disappointed to note though that after 15 minutes of excitedly lugging me up and down pasture hills - he was not even WARM. It was like it had been no exertion at all!
Note to self: 30 minute ride/walks are DEFINITELY in order now!
I'm excited to see what today tells about lastnight's excursion. Was this too much? Will he be sore? Stiff? Depressed?
Or will I walk up to a bright eyed and bushy tailed horse?
Ahh that's the story of his entire recovery: you never know what tomorrow brings.
So I've decided to enjoy 'today' as it were when we can...
Sunday, March 31, 2013
The Triumphs of March
The close of March draws near this weekend and I find myself stunned, wondering where the month went. I love summer with a passion, so it's always my goal to make sure spring doesn't slip by unnoticed: I love having a long prequel to summer. ;)
I think it's safe to say Diego is settling in well at the new place. This month he's taken to scrapping with neighbors over stall gates in the barn whenever we walk past, he's perking his ears when the pasture horses creep closer to investigate us, rather than looking worried and hiding behind me. His personality is coming out in full force: bold, energetic and bully-ish. The barn manager expressed surprise and amusement over it just this week. We all agree spring is in the air and he's feelin' it.
Once I got his diet settled and squared away last month, then it was time to address his trim. His hooves need a different trim now than they did though the winter: change of terrain, time passed and work intensity all demand a change. Change is by nature difficult for me and I find my habits and muscle memory slow to alter, so I've taken a step back and given him a month without any hoof changes and will alter the trim as needed soon.
So what's left on the agenda after diet and trim + regular in-hand work is all addressed?
I've gotten to sit on him quite a few times on calm evenings at the barn after our walks. That in itself was HUGE.
I spent some time feeling down and guilty though after my first few mounts: Diego kept moving away from whatever mounting object I was using. We know eachother well enough for me to know this is from a hesitancy due to pain, not a desire to 'get out of work' (this horse could outwork ME if he wanted). I got on him anyway (the part I've been feeling guilty over), and once mounted he seemed perfectly fine, if anything, antsy to walk and really stride out. His huge strided walk is back in full force! Slowly though as we've progressed to taking 10 minute rides down the driveway - I start to feel less guilty. Some well timed articles detailing the horses' two fold ability to live in the moment and protect their body from pain AND also remember back to painful memories and protect their body from that remembered pain (whether currently relevant or not) surfaced this week and I found myself analyzing the situation yet again. Diego has alot of remembered pain from years of imbalance and his lumbar issue, then a year of being forced to work with a rider on his back when he had sore and sometimes laminitic hooves. I cringe at the thought but that was the reality... meanwhile I had been frustrated as I could be looking at external solutions like tack changes and joint supplements. I find it interesting that after a handful of decent, very short rides D has come to stand still (albiet impatiently) for mounting.
Since we only spend 10-15 minutes each time with me riding I've been at a loss for what to work on. One thing I decided this time around - was I did not want to let him go 'long and low' 100% of the time. Learning how the back works I've learned that letting the nuctural(?) ligament take up the slack and hold me up (which is what it's doing when he lowers his head way down) will not accomplish my goal of building back muscle properly. Naturally I don't want him to go around tense, high headed and hollow either, so there had to be an in-between.
So far he's operating at 100%, meaning as always he remembers and can execute almost anything right off the bat: leg yields, half passes, shoulder in, haunches in - you name it! I was shocked. Instead of starting back at square one, mentally he's starting back at square 8 out of 10! I have to be careful to remind myself his body isn't as far along as his mind is, but regardless he's surprisingly flexible. Maybe all this time healing those hooves have truly helped him in that he's not moving with hoof pain anymore!
I've taken to trying some shoulder ins this week, with varying degrees of rein contact. I do enjoy riding on a very loose 'live' rein, but in light of not wanting his head all the way down to or below his chest 50% of the time I'm forced to ride with more contact than either of us are used to. I'm thinking this is a good thing in a way though:
1) his bitless cavessons that I use don't seem to transmit the 'drape' of the 'live rein' very well, so he's not alert and responding to the rein till it hits his neck for the most part.
2) anytime I take up more contact he gets excited, stiff, raises his head and does his age-old shuffle/jig, expecting us to go galloping down the barn aisle. O.O
Yeah... no dude.
So slowly I plan to get us used to both types of contact again. I think that's going to be important. Maybe eventually when he can comfortably carry his neck higher again, we will return to a looser 'live' contact but with higher carriage. Granted I'm not trying to force a frame here, and if I get the slightest hint that he can't do something, I certainly won't insist. I think that's an important part of our rehab, trust and mutual respect.
On the horizon? Long walks. I think he will be able to handle those soon. We've spent almost a month taking these baby steps to riding, in April I want to try him on varied terrain and longer distances. The goal is 30 minute walks for the end of April!
I think it's safe to say Diego is settling in well at the new place. This month he's taken to scrapping with neighbors over stall gates in the barn whenever we walk past, he's perking his ears when the pasture horses creep closer to investigate us, rather than looking worried and hiding behind me. His personality is coming out in full force: bold, energetic and bully-ish. The barn manager expressed surprise and amusement over it just this week. We all agree spring is in the air and he's feelin' it.
Once I got his diet settled and squared away last month, then it was time to address his trim. His hooves need a different trim now than they did though the winter: change of terrain, time passed and work intensity all demand a change. Change is by nature difficult for me and I find my habits and muscle memory slow to alter, so I've taken a step back and given him a month without any hoof changes and will alter the trim as needed soon.
So what's left on the agenda after diet and trim + regular in-hand work is all addressed?
RIDING!!!
I've gotten to sit on him quite a few times on calm evenings at the barn after our walks. That in itself was HUGE.
I spent some time feeling down and guilty though after my first few mounts: Diego kept moving away from whatever mounting object I was using. We know eachother well enough for me to know this is from a hesitancy due to pain, not a desire to 'get out of work' (this horse could outwork ME if he wanted). I got on him anyway (the part I've been feeling guilty over), and once mounted he seemed perfectly fine, if anything, antsy to walk and really stride out. His huge strided walk is back in full force! Slowly though as we've progressed to taking 10 minute rides down the driveway - I start to feel less guilty. Some well timed articles detailing the horses' two fold ability to live in the moment and protect their body from pain AND also remember back to painful memories and protect their body from that remembered pain (whether currently relevant or not) surfaced this week and I found myself analyzing the situation yet again. Diego has alot of remembered pain from years of imbalance and his lumbar issue, then a year of being forced to work with a rider on his back when he had sore and sometimes laminitic hooves. I cringe at the thought but that was the reality... meanwhile I had been frustrated as I could be looking at external solutions like tack changes and joint supplements. I find it interesting that after a handful of decent, very short rides D has come to stand still (albiet impatiently) for mounting.
Since we only spend 10-15 minutes each time with me riding I've been at a loss for what to work on. One thing I decided this time around - was I did not want to let him go 'long and low' 100% of the time. Learning how the back works I've learned that letting the nuctural(?) ligament take up the slack and hold me up (which is what it's doing when he lowers his head way down) will not accomplish my goal of building back muscle properly. Naturally I don't want him to go around tense, high headed and hollow either, so there had to be an in-between.
So far he's operating at 100%, meaning as always he remembers and can execute almost anything right off the bat: leg yields, half passes, shoulder in, haunches in - you name it! I was shocked. Instead of starting back at square one, mentally he's starting back at square 8 out of 10! I have to be careful to remind myself his body isn't as far along as his mind is, but regardless he's surprisingly flexible. Maybe all this time healing those hooves have truly helped him in that he's not moving with hoof pain anymore!
I've taken to trying some shoulder ins this week, with varying degrees of rein contact. I do enjoy riding on a very loose 'live' rein, but in light of not wanting his head all the way down to or below his chest 50% of the time I'm forced to ride with more contact than either of us are used to. I'm thinking this is a good thing in a way though:
1) his bitless cavessons that I use don't seem to transmit the 'drape' of the 'live rein' very well, so he's not alert and responding to the rein till it hits his neck for the most part.
2) anytime I take up more contact he gets excited, stiff, raises his head and does his age-old shuffle/jig, expecting us to go galloping down the barn aisle. O.O
Yeah... no dude.
So slowly I plan to get us used to both types of contact again. I think that's going to be important. Maybe eventually when he can comfortably carry his neck higher again, we will return to a looser 'live' contact but with higher carriage. Granted I'm not trying to force a frame here, and if I get the slightest hint that he can't do something, I certainly won't insist. I think that's an important part of our rehab, trust and mutual respect.
On the horizon? Long walks. I think he will be able to handle those soon. We've spent almost a month taking these baby steps to riding, in April I want to try him on varied terrain and longer distances. The goal is 30 minute walks for the end of April!
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